My favorite section so far- excerpt from chapter 2

WWF Bedtime

Ah, my least favorite time of day. And now, it’s time to play, ‘How Many Ways Can You Think to Get Out of Bedtime?’ Yeah, that’s about how it goes most night. Let’s see- hungry, scared, cold, hot, wet, need to pee, miss mom, miss dad, love mom, love dad, thirsty, too loud, too quiet, too light, too dark, need more toys, too many toys in my bed, not tired, too tired (yeah, I’m serious), need music, need different music, need a story, need different pajamas, too excited, forgot “something”, ummm… (that’s my favorite), needed to see what mom and dad were doing, and – well, I think that’s it. I’m tapped out of excuses. But I am sure you have heard all of those and many more. What is it about bedtime that is so detestable to little kids?! I look forward to bedtime with great anticipation every day! I suppose our Tired Index is much different than that of a child. We already discussed my many reasons for being tired and I am sure you could list many of your own. While we would love to give our kids a Tiredness Transfusion, that particular science has yet to be tapped into. SO we sojourn on with the tools we have available to us currently. I was lucky enough to stumble across the most amazing bedtime idea in a magazine one day, and it changed my life! So, this is where you will be privy to Rule Number Seven- Be Creative (And Don’t Be Afraid to Make a Fool of Yourself!).
Today, yes the very day that I sat at my computer and wrote this, Drew was displaying a rather ugly side of his temper. Drew has a hard time keeping his emotions in perspective sometimes. We use the 911 Emergency Rule- if this is something you need to call 911 for, you may scream. If not, use your “big boy voice” to convey the problem in calm, reasonable terms to the party(ies) involved. Anywho, back to today, he was shrieking. I asked what limb had just been amputated and he explained that Evan wasn’t letting him play the games in the DVD special features section. I was getting ready to go into the same old tired speech as always about how he should calmly come to a compromise with his brother in this situation. (Did I mention he had barged into the bathroom as I was just getting out of the shower? I love problem solving in the nude- helps me think.) I suddenly had this geeky flash of brilliance. I started singing this terrible “Drew Can You Do an Angry Dance?” song. (Never fear, my towel was available and employed at this point.) Drew started stomping a foot and then both feet. He started smiling and Robby started dancing along. (If you were questioning, I have ABSOLUTELY NO PRIVACY!) Robby started singing as he danced. The song went on describing Drew’s dance moves. It was a growling angry sounding song, but we all were smiling. I asked Drew if he felt less angry. He said, “Yes”. I told him that now that his angries were out because of his Angry Dance, he could go ask Evan nicely if they could agree to a compromise. They are still kids and they didn’t really compromise. Evan just continued watching the DVD. However, there was no screaming, shrieking, pushing, hitting, kicking, fighting or other violence. Be creative. Parenting isn’t a concrete set of rules (except for mine, of course). Think around problems. Take your kids off guard. My greatest successes in parenting came when I took my kids off guard in a positive way. Kids learn to block out the negative. Use your talents to get their attention before it gets ugly. Use your talents to teach them how to cope positively with negative things. Be creative and pass it on to your kids.